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01 April 2009 @ 09:36 pm
Of STDs, ninjas and reviews. Not necessarily in that order.  
First off,


I have wasted enough of my life playing the first 3 versions of this game for no good reason other than pure obsession with unlocking every last thing in them. I don't even have anyone around here to play it with that's on my level and I will not fall into your black pit of endlessly easy fights again! I haven't watched or read any Naruto in ages, but you have no idea how much I have the urge to feel those familiar button crunching sequences again. So stop tempting me LiveJournal!

Not much to report going on here on my end, except for the fact that my cat is apparently a man-whore, or used to be anyway. Virgil's eyes had been getting worse than usual lately, so I took him to the vet. They said he had eye ulcers due to Herpes and probably Chlamydia also. I feel like making a commercial about how your cat can live a happy, healthy, normal life with Genital Herpes now since cat Herpes are more or less a life long condition that he's always going to have. Virgil's also going to cause me to go broke real quick because the vet keeps insisting on seeing him every week to check if his ulcers are getting any better. I should have the vet that usually looks after the animals over in our building call over to the teaching hospital and tell the vet student who's on the case that I'm trustworthy and knowledgeable enough that I would bring him in if I noticed his condition getting any worse before I rack up any more vet bills. Ah well, whatever. They've obviously been told at some point not to trust the pet owner, even if they are an animal lab technician. How very House M.D. of them.

The Fall - Highly imaginative, beautifully filmed, very sad story of a young girl stuck in a hospital with a broken arm who befriends a stuntman who may never walk again. He uses the girl to try to get him drugs so he can kill himself and enchants her with made up fairy tale like stories that she comes to listen to him tell everyday. Reminded me some of the movie The Little Princess, just super depressing. Very good though so 5 stars from me.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor - There might have been a good idea for a movie in here somewhere, but as soon as people started throwing around lines like, "My ass is on fire! Spank my ass! Spank my ass!" and when the yetis showed up and started doing the GOAL! arm thing when they punt guys from the Chinese military over Tibetan arches, sorry movie, but I just can't take you seriously any more. 3 stars just because some of the effects were good and it wasn't the worst movie I've ever seen, though knowing me and what I watch a lot of the time that isn't saying much.

Coraline - Not a bad retelling of the book. This might be the first animated film I've ever seen in the digital 3D, though I think that aspect of it was underused actually. It had that sort of creepy vibe about it that the book did, but I think it would have been better if it was a little bit scarier. I feel really bad for any parents who took their kids to this movie though, because they were in for a surprise I'll bet. Hi, huge old lady boobs! 4 stars, recommend.

May - Different is the only word I can think of to describe this movie about one very socially awkward vet technician, with a fetish for the macabre and a very ugly porcelain doll for a best friend. I liked it, but I would be very hard pressed to say why exactly. 4 stars, not recommended for everybody but if you're you're in the mood for something seriously weird then I couldn't think of a better movie to watch.

Legend of the Shadowless Sword - Korean martial arts flick about an exiled prince who is being forced to take the throne of his kingdom because all the other princes have been assassinated. Of course the pretty, I can kick butt but you're going to have to save me at some point anyway, female general is sent to protect him and return him from his exile. The fights were pretty good, but there wasn't anything real special about the plot or the characters that might make the movie memorable later on. 3 and half stars just so I can give it a little bit higher score than The Mummy 3 because I'd feel bad if I only gave it 3 since this was a much better movie.

The Emperor's New Groove - People at Disney, what were you smoking when you made this, I just have to ask? More like a Loony Tunes cartoon then a Disney movie, Sara and I just kept trying to figure out why Disney decided to rape the Aztec culture in order to make a movie that's basically just a bizarre attempt at an animated slap-stick comedy. Rather disliked all the characters except for Kronk, that guy is awesome. XD Disney apparently figured this out too because the sequel is all about him, which I might kinda have to watch it just because of that. 2 stars and a big "Huh?!" from me.

Total Eclipse - Leonardo DiCaprio plays the prodigious 19th-century French poet Arthur Rimbaud and David Thewlis is Paul Verlaine, an older and more traditional writer who's Rimbaud's mentor and lover. The sad thing about this movie is that I might have kind of liked the main characters together if they both weren't such bastards. Verlaine drinks, abuses his wife, lights her hair on fire, and then moans and groans about how much he loves both of them. Meanwhile Rimbaud is just more or less annoying as all hell because he thinks he's so far ahead of all the other writers in the world that nobody could possibly understand him and just does whatever he wants under the guise of artistic expression. The acting ranged from pretty good at times to totally over the top in other places. I love David Thewlis as an actor, but no thank you movie, I did not need to see his manly bits and now I really wish I hadn't. The movie itself had a few issues too; it didn't flow very well, jumping from one week, month or year to the next without much warning. 2 and half stars, and a wish that I could unsee a few things that I saw in this movie.

Darkon - Documentary about a group of live action warfare role players who basically spend all their free time making armor, weapons, inventing strategists for invading other kingdoms in the game, etc. Honestly, if you took out all the parts of this movie that was stuff about the RPs everyday lives and just left in the bits where it showed what was going on in the game, you would have have a pretty good fantasy movie. The people that do this stuff are so involved in it that they are actually better actors and actresses than a lot of actors in most fantasy movies. Considering how much time the game took up in their day to day lives, everyone seemed to be having a good time doing it so more power to them. 4 stars because this was a very nicely filmed documentary and I actually found it pretty interesting, at least the in game bits I did.

Reviews still yet to do: Peaceful Warrior, Eight Days a Week, Children of Men, My Name Is Bruce, Death Race (2008) I'll get around to them...at some point. =P Until then, later all!
(Anonymous) on April 4th, 2009 02:36 am (UTC)
"Legend" of the "Shadowless" Sword
hehehe, I saw that movie a few months ago and was bewildered by the fact that there really isn't a "legend" or a "shadowless sword". It was an ok movie, but I found the villain hard to take seriously. I think it was the fact that he wore more makeup than any of the women in the film. And also, what the hell was up with all the people exploding?

Have you seen the 2nd X-files movie yet? It was ok. Don't care for Mulder in a beard tho. The gag reel was pretty funny, since they filmed outdoors and people kept falling in the snow.

- K

PS - oooof, my lumbar!

Jenn-ocide: lovin'sporks_of_doom on April 12th, 2009 06:43 pm (UTC)
..........i like the emperor's new groove >.<